We now live in a culture where Dad is an equal partner in care giving. From
day one, dads are encouraged to be hands-on, changing diapers, giving baths,
putting Baby to sleep and calming her cries. That presence and effort is the
beginning of a very important relationship. According to Austin, this quality
time together is crucial at all stages of a girl's life. "Dads need to
spend time with their infant daughter, taking care of her physical needs and
supporting her Mom," he explains. And once the little lady starts toddling
around, "[i]t's essential that Dad gets down on the floor — on her
level — and plays with her," Austin says.
Researchers found that, overall, the love -- or
rejection -- of mothers and fathers equally affects kids' behavior,
self-esteem, emotional stability, and mental health.
"But in some cases, the withdrawal of a father's love seems to play a
bigger role in kids' problems with personality and psychological adjustment,
delinquency, and substance abuse," says study coauthor Ronald P. Rohner,
Ph.D., director of the Center for the Study of Parental Acceptance and
Rejection at the University of Connecticut in Storrs. And for others, the
presence of a father's love may do more to boost children's sense of well-being
and improve their emotional and physical health.For decades, psychologists and other researchers assumed that the mother-child bond was the most important one in a kid's life. They focused on studying those relationships, and however a child turned out, mom often got the credit — or blame.
Within the last several decades, though, scientists are increasingly realizing just how much dads matter. Just like women, fathers' bodies respond to parenthood, and their parenting style affects their kids just as much, and sometimes more, than mom's.
"We're now finding that not only are fathers influential,
sometimes they have more influence on kids' development than moms," said
Ronald Rohner, the director of the Center for the Study of Interpersonal
Acceptance and Rejection at the University of Connecticut.
This is true for both parents, Rohner told
LiveScience. But in some cases, dad is a more important factor than mom
Rohner and his colleagues recently reviewed decades of studies on parental acceptance and rejection across the globe. Unsurprisingly, parents have a major effect on their kids. When kids feel rejected or unloved by mom and dad, they're more likely to become hostile, aggressive and emotionally unstable. Parental rejection also can lead to low self-esteem, feelings of inadequacy and negative worldviews.
By the same token, dad's love is sometimes a stronger influence for children than mom's, the researchers found.
"Knowing that kids feel loved by their father is a better predictor of young adults' sense of well-being, of happiness, of life satisfaction than knowing about the extent to which they feel loved by their mothers," Rohner said. He and his colleagues detailed their findings in May in the journal Personality and Social Psychology Review.
Being a good dad
Fortunately for dads, biology is there to back up good parenting. Hormonal studies have revealed that dads show increased levels of oxytocin during the first weeks of their babies' lives. This hormone, sometimes called the "love hormone," increases feelings of bonding among groups. Dads get oxytocin boosts by playing with their babies, according to a 2010 study published in the journal Biological Psychiatry.
Fatherhood also leads to declines in testosterone, the "macho" hormone associated with aggressive behavior, according to research published last year in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. This change is stronger the more involved a dad is with his baby's care, suggesting that it may reduce a man's risk-taking drive and encourage nurturing and domesticity.
What's most important, Padilla-Walker said, is that fathers realize they matter. Quality time is important, she said.
"That doesn't mean going on fancy vacations, it can be playing ball in the backyard or watching a movie with your kids," she said. "Whatever it is, just make yourself available and when you're with your children, be with them."
A sensitive and attentive father has a positive influence on his child's development. But only if he
spends a considerable amount of time with the child during
its first year.
A father's influence on a
daughter's self-image
A dad's involvement in his daughter's life is a crucial ingredient in the
development of a young woman's self-esteem. Austin identifies positive elements
of "common sense" parenting for dads so they can help support their
daughter's self-image and curb any possibility of low self-esteem: Verbal encouragement,
being consistently present in her life, being alert and sensitive to her
feelings, taking time to listen to her thoughts and taking an active interest
in her hobbies. "It's important to actually do these things, which
can sometimes be quite challenging," Austin adds. Direct involvement and
encouragement by her father will help diminish a girl's insecurity and increase
her confidence in her own abilities.
Dads who play with their kids from day one not only boost their child's physical and mental development significantly more than those who don't "join in", but hands-on fathers also suffer from less stress. "Fathers can attune to their babies, to become familiar with them, their likes and dislikes, and therefore increase their confidence with the baby," insists Helen Hans, a postnatal leader with the UK's National Childcare Trust.
Modern fathers seemingly have no qualms these days about holding the baby. Many of them have seen role-model dads such as David Beckham, Jamie Oliver, Will Smith and Johnny Depp carrying their babies or taking time out with their kids and now follow suit. Recent studies from a German Primate Centre in Gottingen found that men also develop a stronger interpersonal relationship if they regularly put their baby in a papoose-style carrier and take them out to explore the world.
Scientists observed male Barbary macaques bringing their babies to social gatherings to help them bond with other males in the society and to lift their status in the group. More recently, researchers at Memorial University in Newfoundland, Canada and the Bar-Itan University in Israel have found that men experience a surge in "bonding" hormones around the time their children are born.
The Canadian studies suggest that even during their wives' pregnancies, men experience a shift in their levels of stress hormone, cortisol, as well as prolactin, a hormone linked to parenting behaviour. This is backed up by the data from Israel which also shows a rise in oxytocin, a chemical that can dilute a man's alpha-male attitude and engender a more nurturing nature. In short, it's an evolutionary response to turn lads into dads.
However, those hormone levels have in time been found to return to pre-pregnancy levels in men. And so, once the initial elation of becoming a father is over, many dads can tend to take a back seat in parenting. Experts such as Hans suggest that by maintaining a hands-on involvement with their children through the toddling years, fathers can strike up a relationship that will help them and their children combat issues later in life such as depression.
real men wear babies
Now that you have understood for all about being a good father is to take an active role in their child life so try hard to do as many things with them as much as possible. There a good way you can do this is to wear your baby when you go out or in the house doing the house work or whenever you have your little one
Here is something about having your baby close to you
felling S/he breathing, felling safe and sound that make you just fell so
wonderful and sweet. For me it was the best felling in the world. it was great
as I could get on with the house work or any other kind of work that was doing
and still have baby close knowing she was safe warm and happy. That what
wearing your baby does for you? It free up your hands which allows you the do
almost anything you want without having to leave baby by itself which make‘s
for a more calmer happier baby and therefore a happier child later on.
I have been shopping
with my child I got out of the car up her in the sling and just gone
shopping it took me no more time than putting on a coat . Just think how much
time it takes to put up the push chair, how much room it takes up. Here in
Greece the road are not the best my blood run cold when I see people pushing
the baby out first in front of them before they cross the road. I never had
that at all
Another thing is the price of a push chair how much?
The tie I used up until she was 3 year was around 5 euro yes I said 5 euro and
it look good too. Came in real handy in many many way
Wearing your baby is so good and is the oldest and
most natural way of looking after your child. I have give many classes in this
and most dad’s love it and so do mums too do you know you can breast feed anywhere and no one can
see yes I said anywhere it the best .
